Monday, June 8, 2009

Not Me! Monday


Since I was on vacation all last week, laziness was at its peak and therefore there should be plenty to blog about for today. However, I generally blog my "Not Me!" posts as the week goes on so I don't have to try to recall everything on Mondays. BUT...because I was on vacation, I wasn't near my laptop all the time so I wasn't able to do that. So we'll see what I can recollect for this week's edition. :)

I definitely did not steal the password for the hotel's wireless internet when we arrived on the island since I thought it was ridiculous that they wanted me to sit in the lobby to use my laptop when I had a perfectly comfortable room upstairs. And besides, they shouldn't have had it sitting out on their check-in countertop in perfect view of anyone who might be looking....regardless of the fact that it was "technically" in their territory. Because I'm not a thief, I certainly don't need to justify my actions by telling you that if I had even once chosen to use my laptop in the lobby, they would have freely given me the password and I would have had it for the remainder of our stay anyway.

And speaking of internet usage, my husband and I surely did not sit in the parking lot of a Country Inn and Suites, search Hotwire for a local hotel, and book it using Country Inn's wireless internet service. I would never participate in something so heinous as internet-stealing and would also never congratulate my husband on such a frugal idea.

There is no way that, while driving home yesterday, I became so annoyed with the people who failed to get into the right lane after having SIXTY MILES NOTICE (no exaggeration) that the left lane would be closing and thereby were causing a THIRTY-MINUTE DELAY that I drove in the middle of the two lanes, thereby making it very difficult for traffic to pass me on the left. I in no way would ever do such a thing. And since I wouldn't ever do anything like that, I also didn't notice that other respectable people (who had been driving in the right lane for miles, I might add) were catching on and doing the same thing to prevent others from continuing to pass in the left lane.

And finally, I definitely did not watch a chipmunk jump sporatically around the yard due to what I can only imagine was some sort of poison-induced state of mind. I certainly did not discuss different ways we could put it out of its misery while watching it slowly die. And after it died, there is no way I laughed about taking it to the church's animal blessing service I read about in the local paper, all dressed up in a tiny chipmunk suit (think Jerry of Tom and Jerry) and lying peacefully in a red velvet chipmunk casket. Because you know, I am such an animal rights person!

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